Sick Days

Just an advance apology and disclaimer: Most of my posts won't suck this much. Hopefully. I just needed to write the first "real" post and convince myself that it in no way defines the direction of my blog or whatever. I also will try not to whine as much as I'm about to. Key words there: will try. But you have that nice little X that you're always welcome to click if I bore or annoy you. I use it very frequently re-reading old posts.

I've had the most obnoxious cold ever for about a week. (I think it's almost gone -- fingers crossed.)

I woke up last Wednesday with a sore throat, which is usually my first clue that I'm getting sick.

My colds usually follow a very clear progression and get better and worse in stages somewhat akin to this:

Day 1: Sore throat. Immediate denial of illness followed by orange juice, rest, and steamy showers for good measure. Belief that I have staved off illness by taking such good care of myself. Ridiculous amount of congratulating myself for staving off illness.

Day 2: Stuffy nose, sore throat, headache, cough. Irritation with cold for refusing to be staved. Empty Kleenex box mocking failed attempts at staving off illness. Continued denial that illness will last and resolution to power through. (Which means I go to work.)

Day 3: Yuckiness all around. Eye-rolling at "power-through" crap of Day 2. Overwhelming desire to stay in bed forever coupled with irrational irritation with bed for being too warm, too boring, too not what I'm supposed to be doing, etc. (Which usually means I call in. Fortunately, the last two times I've been sick -- not including this one -- Day 3 has fallen on a Tuesday.)

Day 4: Massive improvement in -- but not elimination of -- all symptoms. Resolution to power through yuckiness and make up for lost day. Smugness at feeling better than yesterday.

Day 5: Disappointing decline in energy levels. Irritation with self for overdoing it yesterday. Irritation with self for not learning that this is what I do every time I get a cold and just taking Day 4 off. Resolution (though waning) to power through because I said I was better yesterday, so I have to still be better today. Complete exhaustion at end of day.

Day 6 and so on: Gradual improvement.

(The average cold lasts five to seven days, according to some "How much do you know?" quiz about differences between cold and flu symptoms.)

So last Wednesday, Day 1, I took the day easy (I have Tuesdays and Wednesdays off) and went into work Thursday and Friday.

I felt terrible on Thursday, Day 2, but I've felt worse, so I didn't call in. By the time I got home, my nose was completely stopped up, and my head was pounding.

On Friday, Day 3, I felt a lot better -- so much better that when one of my coworkers asked if I was going to go out with a group of them after work on Saturday, I said maybe.

That night, I slept maybe four hours because I couldn't breathe at all.
So on Saturday, Day 4, I called in. And felt like the biggest jerk ever.

I work in news, and I work nights, so as you might imagine, someone calling in on a Saturday really sucks. It means either everyone else takes on more work (and you get used to working on Saturdays, but you never get so used to it that you don't miss them, so more work on a Saturday can be frustrating) or someone who's usually off gets called in. Either way, it's bad for coworkers. News doesn't stop for you to get sick, so most people work through minor colds. This was no minor cold. But I didn't know that then. I just thought I needed a day of rest. Also, that's the day with the biggest work load.

And because I was feeling better, I hadn't whined to anyone, so no one really knew I wasn't feeling well. And then, BAM. I'm not coming to work, guys. SURPRISE! Happy Saturday and Football Conference Championship Across the Country Day, suckers! I don't work in sports, but I had talked to a couple of people who do and was planning to help them that night.

Anyway, I started feeling better physically toward the end of the night. Which made me feel even more like a jerk.

So Sunday, Day 5, I got up and thought, "OK. Today will be better."

But I felt terrible. I did feel a little better once I got moving, but not as much as I'd expected.

Monday, Day 6, I woke up determined not to have any expectations ... but hoping ...

And my body was like, "Nope. Now you have a cough."

Throughout the whole thing, I never felt like I'd hit the floor of the cold -- that point where you know it's not going to get any worse, and I felt better and then worse constantly. It made no sense, and it completely ignored the (I thought) agreed-upon progression.

(My expectations are this irrationally high with everything. It's a problem. I'm working on it, but these things don't change overnight, and they tend to intensify when you're sick, so I just don't see myself being reasonable about illness anytime soon.)

So finally, after two completely unproductive days on the couch under blankets, a whole box of Dayquil, and two Wednesdays on which I did not get a Christmas tree as previously planned, it's looking like I'm going to be able to sleep through the night of Day 8 breathing through my nose.

I am so excited.

Let's hope Day 9 is continued improvement. I'm not sure I can handle another descent.